Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Just A Few Low Cal Recipes :)



Egg Bake- makes 2 servings (108 calories each)

Quaker - Lightly Salted Rice Cake (1/2 Starch), 1 cake      
Cheese-Kraft Natural Shredded Cheese - Colby & Monterey Jack 2% Milk, 1/4 cup
Aldi - Real Bacon Bits, 2 Tbsp.     
Egg White - 1 Egg Whites, 1/2 cup            
Aquafina Water - 16.9 Oz., 2 oz.

Heat oven to 375 degrees F. take the rice cake and break it in half, then in half again so you have a total of 4 pieces, set aside. Spray two soufflé dishes with cooking spray, and in a small bowl, beat eggs and water and set aside. in each cup put in 1 tbsp. of bacon bits, and top with two pieces of rice cake in each. Finally pour half the egg mixture in each cup and then bake for 5-10 minutes or until egg is fully cooked. After removing it from the oven, place 1/8 of a cup of cheese on each cup and enjoy!



Open Egg Sandwich -77 calories

Quaker - Lightly Salted Rice Cake (1/2 Starch), 1 cake      
Eggs - Fried Egg White, 1 large egg           
Generic - Turkey Bacon (25 Cal), 1 slice

Preheat oven to cooking directions for the bacon, next set a rice cake out on a plate. While the bacon is cooking, fry the egg white and then place the egg white on top of the rice cake. When the bacon is ready, carefully remove it from the oven and rip/cut the slice into two pieces and place on top of the egg and rice cake.
Also yummy if you add some shredded cheese, peppers, or anything else you would like for a few added calories.




Rice Cake “Nachos”- 103 calories

1tbsp ground beef
1 rice cake
1/2 tsp. chili powder
1/8 tsp. cumin
Dash of onion salt
Dash of garlic powder
Dash of cayenne pepper (optional)
1 tbsp. water
1 tbsp. shredded Colby jack cheese

First, measure out all the spices in a small bowl and put off to the side.
Next, brown the hamburger in a frying pan over medium-low heat. Once fully cooked drain any grease and dispose of properly, then add the water and the spices with the drained hamburger in the frying pan. Mix thoroughly and let simmer on low heat until almost all the water has evaporated.
Now on plate, put the rice cake, top with the hamburger and shredded cheese. Microwave for 10 (you may repeat the cook time once more if needed) or until cheese is melted. *note: DO NOT MICROWAVE RICE CAKES FOR MORE THAN 10 SECONDS AT A TIME!




Homemade Sun Dried Tomato Herb Soup- makes 5 servings, 18 calories each

32 oz. Low Sodium Chicken Broth
8 oz. water Two 5-6" celery stalks
1/10 medium white onion
0.5 oz. Sun dried tomatoes (nit packed in oil)
1/2 tsp. Basil
1/2 tsp. Thyme
1/2 tsp. Rosemary
1/4 tsp. Italian Seasoning
1/4 tsp. Garlic Powder
1/4 tsp. Black Pepper

In a blender, combine water, broken up celery, onion, and tomatoes. Blend until the tomatoes are small red flakes. Put mixture in a pot, add seasonings and bring to simmer. Add broth, bring to boil, serve in 8 oz. servings.


Homemade chicken broth- 5 calories per 8 oz.

One large boneless, skinless chicken breast (cut up)
3-4 cups of water
1 teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoon thyme
1 teaspoon parsley

Simmer for two hours, so the broth has a yellow tone to it. Strain, and serve.



Vegetable Fajita- makes 5 servings, 75 calories each

    2 teaspoons olive oil
    2 cloves garlic, minced
    2 green bell peppers, sliced
    2 yellow bell peppers, sliced
    1/2 onion, sliced
    1 cup mushrooms, sliced
    3 green onions, chopped
    Lemon pepper to taste

In a large frying pan over a medium heat, sauté olive oil and garlic. Let the garlic sauté for 2 minutes, stir in the green and yellow bell peppers. Let the peppers sauté for 2 minutes, stir in the onions. After two minutes add the mushrooms and green onions to the frying pan. Season the vegetables with lemon pepper to taste and stir well. Cover the frying pan and cook until all of the vegetables are tender.
Put some of the fajita mix on top of your rice cake and ta-da! J

Friday, July 19, 2013

I haven't been on in a while...

Life has been crazy. I am finally regestered for classes starting at the end of august- so thats good that i am starting to move forward with my life. My bf is out of town again- and i realized that i might not really want recovery... every time he leaves, i stop eating. i dont want to lose him... but... im not ready to get better. im not ready to gain weight. im not ready to stop restricting and fasting and losing weight... it isnt fair to him that this recovery is so dependent on him- but he is my only constant motivation. im sick. im mind, body, and spirit... i dont understand why he puts up with me. :/

Saturday, June 8, 2013

Im scared as fucking hell...

On monday i start at the emily program and i just dont even know if i can do it. Sunday will be so stressful -i will either end up binging or not eating anything- and either way, i will be motivated to lose weight even more. Im such a failure at recovery... im not sure i even want to try anymore. :'(

Sunday, June 2, 2013

My lunker thighs are gross!

Definition of lunker: something unusually large for its kind. Read More: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/lunker Learn more word meanings at http://dictionary.com Sent from my Dictionary.com Android App

Friday, May 31, 2013

stats- in case anyone is interested?

cw: 116.7lbs
lw: 115lbs
gw:115lbs
ugw:100lbs

Weightless by Mi

Lyrics

Hi, my name is Ana and I'm here to save you
Very smart of you to call me
We will work together and we'll leave no footprints
We'll have wings eventually

I want to embrace you
I will help you to control
I will hurt like hell
I will swallow your sweet soul

It will be nailed to your jawbone
It is painted on the mirror

Stripped to the bone
to the soul to the I don't know
Stripped to the core to the matter
to the flesh and oh!
Stripped to the four in the morning lies
and lullabies
Stripped without clothes without dirt
without baggage without consciousness and you are weightless

So just be a good girl and please follow my rules
Don't forget I'm taking over
Transparent is what you'll be in no time if you're
Taking life in stone cold sober

I want to embrace you
I will make you steal and lie
I will hurt like hell
I will kill you in no time

Everyone's your enemy
You find your worst fears in me

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Would i be perfect, yet?

Experiment

The Ana Bible

I am posting this because... Well, I am not sure those closest to me really understand the trauma and disordered thinking I experience. The Ana Bible explains the exact irrational- yet overwhelmingly influencing- thoughts I have; nearly all day, every single day.

This is the part that I think is the most impacting:

"...The Thin Commandments
1.If you aren't thin you aren't attractive. 
2.Being thin is more important than being healthy. 
3.You must buy clothes, cut your hair, take laxatives, starve 
yourself, do anything to make yourself look thinner. 
4.Thou shall not eat without feeling guilty. 
5.Thou shall not eat fattening food without punishing oneself 
afterwards. 
6.Thou shall count calories and restrict intake accordingly. 
7.What the scale says is the most important thing. 
8.Losing weight is good/gaining weight is bad. 
9.You can never be too thin. 
10.Being thin and not eating are signs of true will power and 
success."

Now before you get mad that this site exists- be aware that it is intending to educate people on how an ED takes over. I also find it comforting to read that im not the only one with these thoughts. 

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Monday, April 29, 2013

I miss my diet pills...

I feel so weak for wanting them back. i miss the energy, and the lack of hunger- all i do is snack 24/7 now. its so gross. i haven't gotten on a scale yet- but i just know Ive gained weight. im going to get so fat and ugly and awful and i just want to go die in my room alone. i cant do this. im not ready- im too weak...

I wont buy more pills though- because i cant hurt you again... but this is killing me. i just want to be thin! why are you so against it? i am not really that thin anyway. im not in danger. you are overreacting. please let me be thin... please, please, please :'(

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Im fucking fat.

Im so sorry ... but no dinner. Ive got goldfish and water to keep me alive tonight at work- but the mere thought of taking in over 600 calories on purpose in one day: makes me want to purge until my body gives out on the floor. I cant do this. Im such a failure. I wish i were dead. I would rather be dead than get fat. I cant... i just cant... :'( please forgive me. </3

Almost 300 calories for breakfast ...

Someone kill me, please ... :'(

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Starting recovery ...

I've given up all diet aids and laxatives /diuretics. Im so scared im going to get so fucking fat... :'(

Friday, April 26, 2013

i cut so much... damn, just walking hurts :'(

cw:119.8lbs


breakfast: nothing (0)
lunch: egg white, green bell pepper, pepper jack cheese burrito (300), applesauce (50) and juice/tea (15)
dinner: well see when i get there. if i can- i will eat. if i cant- its  okay. its one meal. im taking each meal as it comes.

starting to look at diet/nutrition plans for recovering anorexics. not crazy about the ultra high cal counts- but im taking my life back, starting today.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Dear, stop exercising:

And i mean, what else am i going to do? Sit around and let all the food I've been eating ruin all the hard work I've put into this body?! Not going to happen. Im going to be lovely. You should be happy im working out. Im sure youd love my body covered in fat rolls and cellulite. Im sure youd love it if i was too fat to have sex without passing out. You want me to be fat?! No! I didnt think so, so back off!

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Big fat pig!

You disgust me. You have no will-power. You are a failure. You make every anorexic out there- ashamed and they hate you. You cant do anything right. Not even lose your fat ass. Ugh. Pathetic.

Monday, April 8, 2013

Yesterday

Yesterday i had over 1500 calories. Ana is furious with me. The scale will show what a fucking fat ass i have become. I always do this! I get my weight to a low point, and then i eat like a fucking cow. I cant even look at my reflection without tears swelling from my eyes and spilling over so they can run down every inch of blubber on my body. I will never be perfect if i eat like a big fat whore. I punished myself- cutting up my forearm, and letting my blood drip onto my Thinspo collage. Never every time i see it, i will be reminded what the alternative to perfection is.

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Going to try not to weigh myself again today...

But...This morning i was down to 121!!! Woot XD

Must learn how to hide it better...

Rules:

Don't mention calories in food

Don't talk about your weight

Don't put up a fit about eating something with the family

Don't count calories in front of others

Never purge at home

Don't brag about weight-loss

Try to eat something in front of family or friends

Don't workout at home (unless everyone else is gone/sleeping)

Avoid going out to eat at all costs

Don't make thinspo at home

When faced with a large calorie meal, simple drink as much water as possible

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Making an Anorexia Collage

Using these Photos, I intend on making a collage that will serve as motivation to stay friends with Ana. I've been a horrible friend lately and I need to make it up to her. I can make her proud. I know I can.

CW: 122lbs   :D
GW: 115lbs  (by May 11th)